Strangling you in chains. Smothering you in despair. Anxiety and depression can be mighty beasts to break free from. Unfortunately, the state of traditional masculinity is reinforcing these chains. Mental health is a major threat to the well-being of men. This cage constructs barriers and borders which limit their ability to thrive in the modern world.
Traditional Masculinity refers to a set of societal expectations foregrounded through the centuries by gender roles, stereotypes and beliefs. These expectations promote aggression, competitiveness, strength, and courage. In so doing, they discourage vulnerability, emotion, inclusiveness, and weakness.
From a young age, we are taught about gender roles and expectations by our family, peers and society itself. Consequently, many young males feel that in order to ‘fit’ into society, they must conform to these expectations and roles.
Traditional masculinity is still being displayed in schools, sports teams and households. It can be as simple as a mate telling you to stop crying after being tackled in rugby or after being hit by a cricket ball. Little by little, these small comments are continuing to contribute to the presence of traditional masculinity in our society. And little by little the stigma of manhood continues to chip way out of our mates, restricting and restraining them, preventing them from thriving in our modern society.
In a society where the chains of despair and the stigma of traditional masculinity still linger, young men are trapped in a cage of isolation, hindering them from seeking help and facing mental health challenges alone, as the heart-breaking statistics on male suicide continue to remind us.
This is demonstrated by figures released by the Victorian Coroners’ Court, portraying that in the first three months of 2023, 13 young Victorian people took their own lives. Of these 13 people, 9 of them were young males. (Press, 2023)
Ultimately, the stigma of manhood, ‘to take it on the chest’ or ‘to just brush it off’, traps young men in a cage, singling them out, preventing them from seeking help or assistance and compelling them to face depression and anxiety head on alone.
This is explored by Rob Garfield in his 2023 article, published in the Guardian, it’s Time to rethink modern masculinity, “Power, privilege and prestige – the perks of traditional manhood – have distracted men from embracing vulnerability and inclusivity as strengths.” (Garfield, 2023)
By embracing vulnerability, we will no longer feel the urge to man up and ‘take it on the chest’ and will encourage emotion and inclusivity. Ultimately, this will help develop a more diverse, compassionate and inclusive society; that will allow us, as young men of the Blue and Golds, to thrive in society.
So why stand and watch our brothers, fathers and mates slowly be taunted by the stigma of traditional masculinity? Let’s embrace vulnerability, be more inclusive and start thriving in our society. Whilst the restrictions and stereotypes of manhood lurk in our modern-day society, young men of mothers, fathers and the blue and gold will continue to take their own lives. Let’s stand up against the beast together. Let’s break the stigma as one.
- By Harry Rogers, Year 9 TGS student
Latest Blog
Boarding Families - Surviving Homesickness
Homesickness can be brutal for both the child and their parents. As a parent it can feel like your heart is being ripped out in some cases daily. It is extremely hard hearing how sad your boy may sound on the phone, and then you are left reeling for 24hrs until the next call, you are often left worried that they are feeling like this ALL DAY. Rest assured only vary rare cases are that bad, they usually improve as they settle in, and it is temporary. The reality is that most boys tend to save…
Helpful Tips for New Boarding Parents
Name absolutely everything! Socks, undies, phone chargers, water bottles, caps. EVERYTHING!! Make sure you name items with Boy’s name & House number; most parents will put their senior house number if printing the tags so they don’t have to rename items when they move the following year (Corfe House doesn’t have a house number). Some boys find a double bed doona is a better option than single doona as it hangs down the sides of the bed a little more to keep them warmer in winter. An…
Parenting Styles: Parties and the Holidays
As the holiday season approaches, parents and caregivers find themselves immersed in the joy and bustle of festivities. Amidst the celebrations, it’s essential to pause and reflect on the pivotal role our parenting styles play in shaping our children’s attitudes and behaviours, especially concerning alcohol and other drug use. As a father of four young people with my fifth child coming into our family on 8 December 2023, I’m particularly mindful of my parenting style and my role as School…
Building the Boarding Experience - at Home
Family connections is a vital aspect of our Toowoomba Grammar School boarding program that we hold close to our heart. Our Heads of House regularly make the effort to visit our boarding families so they have a better understanding of our boarders' lives, the challenges and experiences, and staff always enjoy the warmth and hospitality provided by families. Head of Corfe House, Henry White and his wife, Samantha recently spent a weekend with the Acton family on Dalgonally Station near Julia…
A New Season for Coach Kabe
Highly respected Head of Basketball and 1st V Coach, Kabe Ciccolini is embarking on a new and inspiring chapter. This season, he takes up the role of Assistant Head of Corfe House, guiding our youngest boarders with a warmth and passion that is uniquely his own. Kabe’s decision to transition into the role of Assistant Head of Corfe House reflects his unwavering commitment to mentorship and leadership. For him, this move signifies a positive step in his career. “It’s an opportunity to further…
Embrace Every Moment
In the words of one of the greatest leaders of all time, Albus Dumbledore, “it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.” The wise wizard spoke these words to Harry as he stood before the Mirror of Erised, a magical artifact that reveals one’s deepest desires. These words tell the story of the balance between our dreams and the richness of the present moment. We live in a world that often urges us to focus on our aspirations; , sometimes we get so lost in our dreams that we do not…
What is the TGS Athletic Development Academy?
As a TGS Old Boy (2003-14), sport has always been an integral part of my upbringing. As a young boy I discovered the joys of cricket, track and field and touch footy. This love of being active led me to studying Exercise Science at University and I was fortunate enough to work with a range of national and international level athletes, culminating in an internship at the Brisbane Broncos. This experience launched my career in the strength and conditioning space, allowing me to work with…
The Boarding and Day Family Connections
My husband Ben and I are four years into our boarding journey at Toowoomba Grammar School, we have two boys in Mackintosh House, Josh in Year 10 and Archie in Year 9, and a daughter Ella who is home with us for one more year before we become empty nesters. We are in the fortunate position that we live reasonably close, so we have the privilege of taking our boys home often and can attend most School events. For many of our boarding families, this is not the case, they live great distances away…
Streamline Success
Education is a transformative journey where the path we choose exerts a profound influence on our ultimate success. A streamed class is like an express locomotive: swift, efficient, and filled with eager passengers zooming towards their educational destination. Meanwhile, an unstreamed class resembles a motley group of hikers who accidentally wandered onto the wrong trail, stumbling and bickering as they struggle to find their way. Imagine the express locomotive of streamed classes, full of…
